Happiness From Within

Published on December 12, 2005 By JillUser In Blogging

I think the saying that only you hold the key to your own happiness is true. My problem is, it seems like everyone else on the planet seems to have the key to your unhappiness. That doesn't seem fair!

I am generally a happy person. I don't know if it is ignorant bliss or I am just a simple person. Maybe I have found inner peace that other, less happy people haven't. It doesn't usually take much to start me off on a happy note.

My problem is how others affect my happiness. If my husband is unhappy, it quickly makes me unhappy even if (and sometimes especially if) there is nothing I can do to cheer him up. Misery does love company and it usually finds it.

Simple things in your day can either keep you upbeat or bum you out. The drivers on the road can either let you merge or cut you off. Shoppers at the market can either ignore that you have screaming kids and only a couple of things in your basket or they can let you go ahead of them at the cashier. Even a simple smile when you make eye contact can make a big difference in one's day.

I guess what I am trying to say here is, keep in mind that you hold the key to others' unhappiness so be nice. It can make a world of difference. You can't make someone happy but you can help keep them there.

Comments

Locamama

on Dec 12, 2005

I think the key is to not take things personal. I used to get my feelings hurt all the time but then one day I just realized that if people are jerks its more about them than me. I just tell myself that they must be having a bad day and let it go.

Though I will say that it can make my day when someone smiles, gives me a compliment, does a small kindness like holding the door etc. Most importantly if someone just says thank you. It's always great to feel appreciated.

MarcieMoo

on Dec 12, 2005

Well said, Jill.

Whether we like it or not, we do influence other people--and we can do it for the positive or the negative. We never know how our words and actions will affect another person--is it REALLY so hard to help the little old Grandma put the gifts for her grandkids in her trunk? Or walk the cart to the cart corral? I think Loca has some very good thoughts.

I think its important that we know ourselves, too...and know to the extent which others affect us. I'm very social and such...and other people's comments affect me more than lots of other people.

kimk546

on Dec 12, 2005

I couldn't agree more. If my boyfriend comes home from work in a bad mood, it doesn't take long for me to come down too.
On the flip side, I've noticed how much I can affect the people around me if I'm in a good mood. Unfortunately, it still doesn't stop me from being a crab some days.

JillUser

on Dec 12, 2005

I just tell myself that they must be having a bad day and let it go

I try to do that too but sometimes it's easier said than done.

it REALLY so hard to help the little old Grandma put the gifts for her grandkids in her trunk? Or walk the cart to the cart corral?

I had the same thoughts just on Saturday!

AvantiTexan

on Dec 12, 2005

Great points. I think that you are right on. One of the things that I find really difficult is, like you, if my better half is having a bad day, it tends to rub off on me. Then we have two crabs instead of just one, which makes the day MUCH worse. Whereas, if I decide to be happy and joyous, then that tends to rub off on her, and the day ends up MUCH better. Not easy to do, but always worth it!

Locamama

It's always great to feel appreciated.

SO true! I found this out fast, it can change the mood completely of a spouse if you let them know that they are appreciated (often). Words of wisdom.

foreverserenity

on Dec 13, 2005

This is such an insightful article Jill, I'm giving you an insigtful! You're absolutely right about everything you said. It's strange when your spouse is not happy about something you somehow get that way too if you can't cheer him up. And if you're unhappy then the kids get unhappy and everyone is in a sad state! Wow, we can't have that at all. Being thoughtful in what we do and how we do is definately something to always think about!

JillUser

on Dec 13, 2005

if my better half is having a bad day, it tends to rub off on me. Then we have two crabs instead of just one, which makes the day MUCH worse.

Sooo true! Like you said, it is always worth trying to cheer them up but it sure seems easier to get dragged into their misery.

This is such an insightful article Jill, I'm giving you an insigtful!

Why thank you very much foreverserenity! Hey, you just helped brighten my day.

stevendedalus

on Dec 17, 2005

guess what I am trying to say here is, keep in mind that you hold the key to others' unhappiness so be nice. It can make a world of difference. You can't make someone happy but you can help keep them there.Belongs in Bartlett's Quotations.

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