The Carlie Murder is Too Upsetting
The murder of 11yr old Carlie has given me a stomach ache since it happened. I have two young children and now my heart jumps every time they are out of sight for any amount of time. To have seen her actual abduction on tape and then have her end up murdered is just something I am having a hard time dealing with.
Recently I came across a group called Kidz Idz. They go around to places like Chuck E Cheese and finger print your children for free so you can keep it on file. They were outside a craft store I was shopping at and they were selling a video called "Yello Dyno's Can't Fool Me!" and "Tricky People". They explained that Yello Dyno is their "Barney" type mascot who teaches kids how to deal with adults. Too many kids get taken advantage of because they are taught to listen to adults. This teaches them that some people are "tricky people" that seem nice but want to harm you.
I think it is a fantastic tool. It doesn't scare the child but both my 3 and 7yr olds were able to understand that if an adult you don't know wants you to come up to them or go somewhere with them, it is okay to run away or yell "not my mommy/daddy!" The worst that can happen is someone might get embarrassed. It tells them that some people have "sadness in their hearts" that makes them want to do bad things.
I always thought it was amazing that so many parents would brag "My son/daughter is so friendly that she would be happy going with anyone." I don't want my child to be that way! Sure, it makes it easier when you have to leave them with a sitter but a few tears with a sitter is a small trade off for having your little one not go off with just anyone.
I personally am battling with myself on how to find a healthy mix of worry wart and letting them have some independence. I don't want them to be afraid of everything but I want them to be safe. It is enough to keep a parent up at night that is for sure!
If you are interested in the tapes, they have a site www.yellodyno.com. I highly recommend them. Play the video, sing the "Tricky People" song and talk to your kids. I have also heard that it is a good idea to have a code word with your children. If someone other than yourself tries to take your child somewhere and they don't know the code word, your child doesn't go.
Best wishes for a safe family.