Congrats For What?

Puzzled by 5th grade "graduation"

Published on June 15, 2006 By JillUser In Misc

Our particular elementary school is K-5. It seems to be an arbitrary process in deciding how many grades constitute school grades since some are K-4, 5-8, 9-12 or other forms of elementary, middle, Jr High and high school departmentalization. Our elementary just happens to end at 5th grade. They also happen to have a 5th grade "graduation".

I was always under the impression that graduation was a celebration of achievement and of transition from child to adult. What have you achieved by 5th grade? What are you transitioning to? I think going from a kindergartner to a 1st grader is a bigger transition in many ways.

I guess I see this kind of "graduation" as belittling the significance of high school or college graduation. You have no choice but to graduate from 5th grade. You can choose to drop out of high school or college. I understand feeling like going from elementary to middle school is a big step. It can't compare to finishing high school or college though. I am just concerned about giving kids a sense of achievement when they really haven't achieved anything.

To me it is just another part of how our kids are given too much too soon these days. Homecoming is as extravagent as my prom was. Prom is as big of an event as weddings used to be. Where do you go from there? You've done the limo, the hugely expensive dress, gotten hair and makeup done, what's left?

So forgive me if I don't congratulate any of the 5th graders. I don't see anything to congratulate them for. Hey, you survived kindergarten through 5th grade. Now you get seven more years of pretty much the same. Congratulations! No, I'll reserve my congratulations for when they complete school and are planning what will come next.

Comments (Page 1)

Texas Wahine

on Jun 15, 2006

Orian had a Kindergarten "ceremony" (where we had to listen to a teacher declare that our children would not know how to read or write or count or form a line if it weren't for the school).

We did buy him a lei to wear for that day (and the little sweetie gave it to his teacher!) because it's tradition to give a lei for pretty much any special occasion. But we didn't buy him a gift or a card or balloons or call him "graduate" as we saw many parents doing with their Kindergarteners (usually parents where the K student was their oldest).

I'm proud that both my boys were promoted to the next grade, but I really agree with you about celebrating the hell out of the commonplace.

Kids are learning to expect to be rewarded for doing things that are REQUIRED of them, and then there's always the pressure to do things bigger and better each time so that the rewards are extravagant and meaningless. These kids will spend their lives unimpressed and nonplussed because they've seen and done and been given everything already.

It's very sad.

JillUser

on Jun 15, 2006

These kids will spend their lives unimpressed and nonplussed because they've seen and done and been given everything already.

It's very sad.

Exactly!

JillUser

on Jun 15, 2006

we didn't buy him a gift or a card or balloons or call him "graduate" as we saw many parents doing with their Kindergarteners (usually parents where the K student was their oldest).

Alex had the same thing for preschool but we went of vacation and totally bypassed Alex's and for Ryan's we went, heard them sing a cute song, had cookies and punch and left. We saw and heard parents doing the same thing you described with their "graduates". I just don't get it.

ParaTed2k

on Jun 15, 2006

You have no choice but to graduate from 5th grade.

I guess that depends on the school.. or rather the student body.

My wife and I just went to a "Middle School Graduation" for the inner city (Milwaukee) school where she did her student teaching. Out of the 25 kids in the Math Class she taught, 9 weren't graduating due to low grades. In Milwaukee Public Schools, only about 45% of the kids who start High School actually graduate. There was a definite sense of achievement in their eyes. I looked at them kind of sad though, knowing that this was probably the only graduation many of them would ever see.

JillUser

on Jun 15, 2006

Out of the 25 kids in the Math Class she taught, 9 weren't graduating due to low grades.

They didn't graduate that year maybe but it isn't as though they can simply quit school and never graduate the 5th grade, right?

In Milwaukee Public Schools, only about 45% of the kids who start High School actually graduate.

Then those 45% achieved something and the rest didn't. There should be no kudos for simply making it to high school. That just perpetuates the problem.

Draginol

on Jun 15, 2006

Let me first preface that I have no problem with families in which both parents work full time. I am not passing judgment on that.

However, almost universally the people who laud all this ridiculous fake achievement stuff are parents who both work full time. I won't suggest why this is the case but it is very consistent.

-----

on Jun 16, 2006

The way I see it ( I think that is what Ted is saying), is that those students in schools that are abysmal, have something to celebrate. Some of those students may not even graduate high school, or even middle school.

That's my take on it.

~L

ParaTed2k

on Jun 16, 2006

They didn't graduate that year maybe but it isn't as though they can simply quit school and never graduate the 5th grade, right?

Statistically, out of the 9, 3 probably won't show up to summer school and won't be back next fall either.

Then those 45% achieved something and the rest didn't. There should be no kudos for simply making it to high school. That just perpetuates the problem.

Actually, I agree with you here. However, in MPS making it to high school IS an accomplishment. Not because the standards are set so high only the elite will make it... but because the expectation is so low.

When my wife was student teaching there, she was constantly told not to challenge the kids academically, it only discourages them and makes them quit school all together.

AngelaMarie88

on Jun 16, 2006

buy him a gift or a card or balloons or call him "graduate" as we saw many parents doing with their Kindergarteners (usually parents where the K student was their oldest).

Hmmm...I kinda wonder if I'm going to be one of those overly-ecstatic parents. I mean heck, every little thing about one's first child is just so freaking CUTE! I've seen some kindergarten graduations where they actually dress the kids in little caps & gowns. I think my husband had such a ceremony when he "graduated" kindergarten.

Aww but this is about 5th grade graduation. Yes that seems a bit much. I guess I can kinda see where they're coming from since they'll technically be moving on to a different school building for the sixth grade...but perhaps an informal party to bid "farewell to our grade school building" would be more suitable than a formal graduation ceremony.

Dr Guy

on Jun 16, 2006

You have no choice but to graduate from 5th grade.

Except Jethro Bodine.

Yea, they have 'graduation' here as well. Same grade system as you (k-5, 6-8, 9-12). And even Kindergarten graduation. I think it is a bunch of baloney. Oh, I make a deal about going to a new school. Because Jr. high is very different from Elementary, and HS is very different from Jr. High. But no graduation presents. Just a big congratulations, and now the real fun begins outing.

amandapearl2

on Jun 16, 2006

I went to a little private pre-k day care type thing for kindergarten because my mom worked there. We had a "graduation" ceremony, but it was a lot of fun because we made caps in arts and crafts time and we got a little diploma saying we were done with kindergarten, and I think it was that way because after kindergarten, we were done at that school.

My public school was elementary k-4, middle 5-8, and high school 9-12. I remember having an assembly in 4th grade as we prepared for middle school, and maybe we ate some food, but there was no graduation ceremony. In eight grade we had a promotion night where we got a certificate saying we were done with middle school and there was a cute slide show, but again, no graduation ceremony.

At all of these things no one got presents or anything, people saved it for huge high school graduation parities. Those were a big deal, and I made a lot of money at mine

. The ceremonies we had when I was younger were more of a "good job so far, keep up the good work" type of a thing.

Poetfae

on Jun 16, 2006

My children had kindergarden graduations with the program and it was a fun way to end the year. Their kindergarden teachers seem to have been the ones who influenced them the most in their education.
There is a grade 8 graduation and they've been around for a number of years. They have gotten bigger and costlier. Guys buy suits and girls get prom like gowns that cost alot. It has gotten quite out of hand. The girls get manicures and their hair and makeup done. They wear the same dress the next day at school for the whole school awards ceremony. I don't know what happened to playing the last day of school.

I do wonder why children get gifts for passing their grade when really in most instances the school will not fail a student and it is something that is to be expected from our children anyway.

amandapearl2

on Jun 16, 2006

Guys buy suits and girls get prom like gowns that cost alot. It has gotten quite out of hand. The girls get manicures and their hair and makeup done.

Why? I get getting dressed up, but to that extent? That doesn't make sense at all. They still have 4 years of school to get through!

mgosh

on Jun 17, 2006

I don't see a problem with the "cute" graduation from pre-pre-school (aka my niece), but I would say the celibration should amount to what the occasion is worth. For instance the graduation of High School, and then College should be much more significant than that celibration.

Of course kids are getting too much too soon, but then again they are becoming the generation that raises themselves as the me-generation parents go out to the workforce. You have two working parents and no one supervising the children, the expectation of 10 year olds to take care of themselves and make dinner for mommy and daddy when they are home from work, while keeping an eye on her younger siblings becomes the norm in soicety.

JillUser

on Jun 19, 2006

Of course kids are getting too much too soon, but then again they are becoming the generation that raises themselves as the me-generation parents go out to the workforce. You have two working parents and no one supervising the children, the expectation of 10 year olds to take care of themselves and make dinner for mommy and daddy when they are home from work, while keeping an eye on her younger siblings becomes the norm in soicety.

That certainly isn't the norm around here. Where are you getting your info and that being the norm? Even if it were the norm, kids have been having to make dinners, do house work and look out for siblings for as long as there have been families. Look at farm families.

We aren't doing kids any favors by giving them everything and anything. Too much too soon is merely destroying their inclination to work toward anything or earn anything on their own. A 5th grade "graduation" isn't earned even if you are in an inner city. It is just a lowered expectation. Bad idea.

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